Goals for this year

As we start a new year with fresh plates and strong resolve (well actually we are starting the second month of the new year so I am way late already), I wonder what we expect in the next few months.

You know, every year we hear the doomday prophets predict how we will meet our doom THIS year or how the stock market will really tank this year. But how much time do any of us really spend thinking about our future? I was talking to a young lady yesterday about her retirement planning. She is in her early 20’s and in a serious committed relationship. She was telling me that she and her boyfriend have been discussing their finances and asking their parents for advice on how to plan for their financial future! What a great idea! How mature! I am approaching 40 and my husband and I have been married for 16 years. We are still very foolish about money and have just in the last few years realized how dumb we have really been for the last decade! I really wish that we had had these types of conversations when we were dating! I wish more young people realized how important it is to really have these deep uncomfortable conversations with your insignificant other BEFORE you decide to spend the rest of your life with them. If you bothered to TALK to them before choosing them for your life partner….maybe you would realize that you don’t agree on some of these rarely discussed topics. Too often we think that certain subjects are not necessary for “dating” couples to discuss……WRONG! Everything that you think about, believe in, want, dream about. All those things need to be discussed , weighed, with the person that you are thinking about spending your life with. Nothing is too trivial to discuss or spend time talking about. This time before you make that final commitment is rare and short, use it wisely. J

Money….finances. All bring a grit to my teeth and a stabbing pain to my abd. What is it about money that makes us to crazy. Wanting it, needing it, spending it. It seems to just ooze through our hands. Budgeting is so painful..my husband and I go back and forth on who is responsible for sending the bills out and keeping track of the register. Honestly, neither of us is very good at it. I am not good at writing things down as I spend, and he is not good at really using the register balance……he looks at the bank balance too much. Money is the only thing that we fight over. Well, it used to be. Over time, it has led to other fights. But they have all started with money. It makes us crazy. Our church is currently covering a series called the “Big Bad Wolf”. Pastor is giving money a persona….that of a wolf. Like any pet, if you don’t train it, it will ruin your house. It must be trained, and kept in check. Money is not necessarily bad, it just must be kept under control. Pastor recommends saving for specific goals rather than for unexpected emergencies.  He pays cash whenever possible.  He follows a budget, he gives heavily (following Christ’s recommendation of 10%) and has a set % pulled from his paycheck and deposited directly into his retirement account. The deposit amount has not changed over the years even though his salary has increased.  We used to pay tithe, but we have not for years. We both agree that we did better financially when we paid tithe. But I think that we need to make sure that we are doing for the right reasons. And every time that we talk about it, the concern that I feel from my husband (and a little from myself as well) is that we really cannot afford to give that much. I honestly am not sure that we can afford not to.